Snowless in Ohio

          When we moved from California to the American Midwest, we knew the winter weather would be different. We prepared for the terrors of winter time in Northeastern Ohio and, for sure, the first three winters have been difficult.

          We’ve had our share of snow over the years since we moved. Snow is pretty, I’ll grant you that, but it brings ice with it and ice represents a chance to wreck your car or crack your skull without doing anything wrong.

          Nobody likes ice on the ground.

          But this winter has been different. We haven’t had a single flake of snow. Not one flake. We’ve had some grapple, which is sort of like snow. We’ve had frost on the roof and lawns. We even had a little rain last week.

          But snow? Nope. Nary a bit of it.

Above is a view of what the backyard should
look like this week. Instead, it looks like
the image below.

          Understand, we were really ready this year. We bought some of those orange sticks you see in the ground around construction sites and we put a few along the sides of our driveway and along the sidewalk in front of where we live. When the snow comes, we’ll know where the driveway and walkways end.

          If the snow comes, that is.

          You start getting confused when the snow is a no show. Mrs. Leeway assured me that we had not magically teleported back to California without warning. She used logic to prove herself correct.

          “This would be a 40 million dollar house,” she asserted. “This place isn’t worth that. You bought gas today for both cars and spent less than 40 bucks, right?”

          “Well, yeah.”

          “In California, we’d be paying an extra half a dollar a gallon. And do you see the state building a train set over perfectly good farm land around here? No, you don’t. I mean, when Jerry Brown says he’s going to railroad you, that man doesn’t fool around. But it isn’t happening here.”

          Solid points, all. With her evidence, Mrs. Leeway convinced me that we were still in Ohio. But that still did not explain where all the snow went.

          “The snow,” she explained, “is in Colorado. The really cold weather is in Canada. I saw it on the TV news.”

          “So they finally closed the Canadian border,” I guessed aloud. “Trump got his way.”

          “No. There is a high pressure system hanging over us and it is keeping the snow and really bad weather away.”

          Suddenly, I was triumphant. I had evidence that she was wrong, after all. Sensing victory, I charged forward with my verbal assault.

          “Hah!” I cried. “That’s what you always hear about in California. A high pressure system.”

          “No,” Mrs. Leeway said with strained patience. “In California, they have a system for getting high.”

          Darn it, she was right again.

          Thanks for reading.